Let me tell you, this is the end. It is lengthy but don’t be foolish and pass it up for it is earth shattering. Butt kicking. Mind blowing.
If you are a sucker for conspiracy theories and Alien hogwash you have got to read this.
Finally we enter the 3rd subject; Truth Quest
In order for you to get the impact of “Three Interwoven” The three stories, you must have had read all three of them.
The Infant Deaths
And now Truth Quest
I was 8 years old on this the day of this occurrence. The day before New Years day.
A great deal of my birthdays went unrecognized. I had the misfortune of having been born on the day before the last day of the year.
So I didn’t expect anything. On many occasions I was the one who forgot my Birthday.
It was late at night. We lived in what was commonly referred to as a “train apartment”.
All the rooms were in a straight line, and connected. There would, in these type apartments, be a door to the outside world at each end.
This was the wondrous Bronx N.Y.C..
Well there I was in the first room facing the street, living room. It was darkened, lights out. I was staring out the window. The darkened building across the street. The stars of the night sky. Had I known where my thoughts would go, I think I would not have gone there. For a child, before his focus is placed upon this “existence”, this fiction, where I went was a scary place to go.
A soliloquy began in my mind;
Does God exist? Who is God? Where is He? And how could there be a God? Didn’t somebody invent God? Who created God? How can this (existence) all be?
You, having just read these words, cannot fully understand their impact upon me.
The line of questioning and reasoning continued. Something was telling, warning me don’t go on with this, please!
You see, as grown ups one can have a conversation like this (perhaps?) but for the fresh mind of a child, who has not yet been brainwashed into this thing we assume to be reality, this is a precarious chain of thoughts to upkeep.
Because the child has a very special outlook. He is actually that thing that he gets accused of not being; serious.
I was chasing the rabbit down the rabbit hole, with ferocity.
I didn’t know it would happen…
The next moment….
I felt as if I would, be standing outside myself, looking at myself. I would lose ground in this fabrication, this gossamer fiber we call reality.
How can this be!
Desperation grabbed me by the throat.
No! No! I had to do something. I knew then what man describes as going insane, losing your mind (I would learn in later life that this was not insanity, I was in the throes of).
All I knew was what I was feeling. The human mind cannot lay a firm grasp on some things.
The following is what I did;
Yes I ran to where my Brothers and Sisters were in the 4th room down in the series of rooms. They were jabbering about nothing.
I knew it then because look at where I had just come from, a more serious conversation.
Noise now; Their jibber jabber. I inserted my self into the conversation. Frantically. And this frantic desperation was not unnoticed by some of them.
As a matter of fact those who noted my fear suspected I had done something bad. But their assessment went unvoiced.
Within seconds I felt it leaving, that feeling that I was about to be separated from my physical body. I kept on talking, and talking.
Grabbing with desperation unto pieces of this role play, this drama. This fiction.
I made a bargain with myself that this was the way things should be, from now on. I would just play along.
Enter: Yo Gabba Gabba.
The Breakdown (explanation of what did occur to me).
What had occured was I had had a Void connection. I had invoked my Voidedness.
Evidence that the Biblical account was true.
A state of disrepair. My true state of brokenness was invoked. That thing within which doth attest my final destination due to my flawed condition; Bereft of the Spirit of God.
Final destination; Discard.
Yes, it is true, not for nothing do we have the myth, “Losing your mind”.
In my culture they say, “No piences demasiado que te vas a volver loco”. Don’t think too much for you will lose your mind.
It is due to this fear (of losing your mind) that we come out of an experience like this and bury it. Bury this message which aeons of time have proven unable to erase from our makeup.
We bury it by buying into this charade. All the drama of life, roleplaying identified with, so as to counter what the Void within is telling us.
We sell ourselves a bill of goods.
Ask yourself one question, before you sell yourself a bill of goods;
Why was my only concern to fall into place, to take my place in the roleplay. In the drama of every day mundanity.
Because our true essence is that of a broken, flawed being. And guess what; you and every one else draws comfort from concluding me insane because I’ve just come from that place you fear.
Why do some people preoccupy themselves with Conspiracy theories?
It is because we, humankind are keeping the truth from ourselves, we are involved in the biggest conspiracy imaginable.
Some one writes a book on the possibility of the existence of Aliens; It becomes a billion (exaggerate) copy bestseller.
As a matter of fact we have made the message from God into the most palatable kind, Church, Christian character, goody too shoes, etc..
Satanic dressing so that it is held in question, ridicule and implausibleness.
IE; we all love to play religion.
But Christ is no goody two shoes. He was a man. I couldn’t do what He did.
He was tough. He wasn’t one of these clowns who wish to mime a kind heart and “spirit”, love etc..
Believe me, you want to see a coverup; The true account about the fall of man, his state of discard awaiting him…
That is the true cover up.
After thought; It wasn’t till late in life that I discovered that this experience was not unique to me.
Thanks for reading.
This has been the end of truth quest.
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