Self Knowledge

This is a old post. I’ve copied and pasted it below. It really should still be of interest, even to those who are familiar with the school of thoughts I preach. Enjoy.

Do you know yourself?

You would say; “Yes, I know myself very well, extremely well, as a matter of fact.”

This person that has been a close companion to you, which you claim you know, is in fact this person you?

You have, no doubt built an outstanding relationship with this person you identify with as being you, a cozy relationship, an exciting and adventurous relationship, full of tales which would impress you, in retrospect, and likely impress some others, but, here’s the thing…..

Consider, first, the fact that these tales would impress you. That is tell tale.

The tales would impress you because; You have invested something into the erecting of those tales. This person which you think is you, is in fact a myth. This persona (let’s say) is a legend which goes hand in hand with all your “preferences”, critiques, estimations.

A thing, a creation fashioned by you through the passing of time. Fashioned from your exploits.

That’s a funny word, “exploits”, like the Sunday Funnies (newspaper).

Permit me to illustrate through a “model”. Which Model is specifically descended from the school of thought that we fashion legends of ourselves which we buy into.

A guy meets a girl. They hit it off. They create a union. It goes well for a while until they are invaded by life, people.

They hurt one another’s pride, push the envelope’s edges, testy.

“Maybe we should break up”; options up to the fore.

They break up.

Let’s work with the dude, at this point. Why? Because this occurred to me.

I’m laying in bed at night feeling the pangs of distress, missing the chick. This is not the first night. I look to console myself by thinking of all the negative things, stuff I despised about her.

It doesn’t work.

Okay, well time will heal this. But, finally brilliance breaks in.

I, bravely ask myself; “Why did we break up?”

I relive the drama, to dig out the instance, which brought about the decision.

It basically was a sense of feeling unappreciated. A sense of; “She (based on her actions) does not know my worth, does not know, in summation, who I am.”

She doesn’t know my value, me (Mickey back then), the great Mickey.

These thought patterns (now comes the brilliance) culminate in; “But wait a second, whoa, who is this great Mickey?”

It is nothing but  a fiction I have struggled hard to give substance to. A legend which has cost me a great deal in time invested.

Nothing but struggles to create a myth, and all set off by the need to identify with value. Fashioned out of fear, out of fear of insignificance.

It had cost me much in friendships, relationships. Hard work.

Value me? Value me, who me? Who am I?.

Because the myth, the legend I have spent a lifetime fashioning has been fashioned by a fool and his errand.

And yes be wary of the wonderfully purveyed ignorance of “Self esteem”. Because it is likely that utilizing this stupidity (band aid), known as self esteem, will be enlisted into the pigheaded support system for the “legend, mythology of you”.

Who are you? Who am I?

We are but blank slates.

Preferential and opinionated.

Thanks for reading. Please don’t be afraid to comment.

I can be reached at turbans713@yahoo.com, and
https://kingrat1397@gmail.com, and at face book as Miguel Angel Oquendo, And at
https://www.facebook.com/BiblicallyReferencingHumanNature/ And the blog;
andnowmiguel.wordpress.com/

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8 comments

  1. It’s true that we are blind, for the greater part, to our complete identity. That’s why so many who read scripture turn away because in those Words we see a reflection of who we really are. A few of us fall to our knees and beg for mercy because truly, we are fools on an errand. Without God, we end in foolishness. In Christ we are given a new errand and protective guidance despite our foolishness. This is our true testimony, how great is our God, our great our foolishness, our great our need for Him, and how marvelous it is to be in a loving relationship with God. I find hope in learning to see me as God sees me but I have to take a good look in that mirror often or, I start seeing me according to my imagination. I often, imagine others as I want them to be also, or I project what I want for myself onto them and am totally, blind to their reality. It’s a very sad thing to get lost in all the projections, imagine yourself not alone, and the wake up to find how alone you really are.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, Pam, you have covered much of the spectrum, indeed. So much that I would be remiss, if I didn’t ask you to peruse your comment and attempt a post covering it. I would much like to read that post if written. Apprise me if you do.
      As to the last portion; Yes, and truly, that is a powerful part of the investment we place in things and circumstances. We vest situations with contextual drama of our own making. Our illusions, depending on how long we leave them in the oven. Power, we loan things and folks. But it can work out to complete God’s Will, His pleasure for our outfitting to be the better channel to advance His Glory. Were it not for His breaking I would not possess the gifts I do. I have just been convicted to put up another old post on His breaking. Gee you are quite the muse this morning.

      Liked by 1 person

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