As a child growing up, though I was easily preoccupied with the joys kids encounter in things, I don’t believe I had the luxury of taking things for granted. I don’t know why I possessed this quality.
As if a old soul inhabited a child’s body.
Later I remember reading something in the lines of a poem by Edgar Allan Poe;
From childhood’s hour I have not been as others were—-I have not seen as others saw—–I could not bring my passions from a common spring……
“Alone” was the title to this poem.
I identified immediately with this poem.
I didn’t know it then, but this was the Void which inhabits every living being upon this planet.
I suppose that I was one of those who would be in for a lifelong relationship of a keen awareness with that Void within.
It was that which permitted me to yank at my little brother’s shirt, pulling him off a sled, one of three which was at that moment launched down a steep decline between structures on Dead Man’s Hill, by 157th st. Bronx NY.
Lots of blood spilled moments after by the kids who were on board those sleds. About three kids per sled. Mounted on ice, they were. You cannot steer on ice. And they were all so happy moments before the crash against brick buildings and metal grill works boardering steps leading down. All this lay at the bottom of the hill for them. No one would listen to me, my assessment of the situation.
The voice of doom belonging to the Void within would not be heeded. But the energy, the joy, glad to be alive, they were. Happy.
I was, to some extent, traumatized on that day, doing what I could for them.
That’s what made me an old Soul. The Void within. A contract between the Void and I.
Indio, a kid who grew up to rob gas stations, and did some time (prison), said; “Mickey always knew the right thing to do.”
Of course I understood wherefrom he developed that opinion. Our experiences together, but no, I’ve had my share of big time mistakes. I still do.
Yet, my affinity with the Void, being conscious of it, is one thing I am grateful for.
This whole of existence is painted by the Void. It is a Voidal Panorama.
It plays out in dualistic fashion. Good or Bad, Positive or Negative, Light and Dark, Joy and Sorrow, Life and Death.
The Void is the source of drive for all those born of a fallen being. Yup, that’s us. Sons of Adam.
It is befuddling to those who have trusted in Christ as well, yes we strive against it. But we know the enemy. We know the promise within our breast. We shall see God, because He provided, not because of anything we have done. Trust can be credited to us in part, but the Holy Spirit dispensed through Christ, gave life to that trust.
It drives us to seek a immortality which is only recognized by us. The exploits of historic figures, the writings of great minds (as we assess them), the achievements recognized by societies we build, the philosophies we admire. Only we’ll have to do a lot of that recognizing in Discard, in Oblivion, in Waste. For man without God will not know dominion eternally.
All those things listed above (recognized by man), because they are Void Driven, out of fear, out of death, are temporal, as a vapor, there one second and gone the next. Fear was their inspiration, the fear of the significance of the Void, Void Guises to delude us, self deception. Impostors.
Because the Void is the ernest of our appertainment, destination, and configuration, we possess a innate which we intuit and so it drives us to belie it, to mirror it in dualities.
It is a opposite of what God has done for us through Christ.
This is a message so misunderstood by us because the Void has driven many to Deny this message, to bury it, and they all undertook that stance, that mission under the name of the Void. Yet deceived, and unknowingly. What a price to pay….
Separation from God who offered them the means to come and live eternally, to be with Him, enabled by the Obedience of Jesus. God’s life dispensed to those who would believe, at the Cross.
Believe that you are Void inhabited, not possessing true Life; this is repentence. This is turning away from your righteousness, the works of the Void.
Seeing your need within. God wants to fill that Void which we secretly fear enough to disbelief its presence. Yes contradict it with Drugs, Alcohol, sex, laughter, success, money, power, fame and celebrity.
You know what I’m tocking bout. In your soul. Your affinity with the Void within.
For some counsel on this, I can be reached at email@example.com or on face book as Miguel Angel Oquendo (careful for there are a few others with this full name; I’m the one who lives in Huachuca City Arizona).